All the signs are there… They are distant. They seem permanently attached to their phone. They always seem to be coming home late or you never know where they are.
You want to approach the subject, but you are afraid of the answer…
Is your spouse cheating?
This is a situation that we hope never happens to us, but unfortunately, infidelity and adultery are far more common than what most of us are willing to admit.
In fact, according to the American Psychological Association (APA), infidelity in the United States accounts for 20-40 percent of divorces. Additionally, an equal number of women commit infidelity and adultery as men.
Although infidelity and adultery come in various forms, the signs are often the same. In this article, we will explore what is considered infidelity and adultery, and some common signs your spouse is cheating.
Infidelity vs. Adultery: What is the Difference?
If you said “nothing”, you are incorrect. There is in fact a difference between the two.
Adultery is purely the physical, sexual act of one spouse with another person outside the marriage without the consent of the other spouse.
Infidelity refers to any level of disloyalty or unfaithfulness in a marriage or relationship, including the act of adultery.
For example, if a wife isn’t getting the attention or emotional support from her husband, having an emotional attachment or relationship with a friend or coworker could be considered infidelity—even if the wife and the other person never engage in any form of physical intimacy or activity.
In fact, many married couples who have experienced infidelity claim that a spouse or partner who has had an emotional attachment with another person outside the marriage was just as hurtful—if not more hurtful—than if the spouse committed the physical act of adultery.
6 Signs Your Spouse is Cheating
If you have noticed your partner or spouse acting or behaving differently, or if you have suspicions that your spouse might be cheating, here are some signs to be on the lookout for:
- He or She Seems Distant.
The first sign of infidelity of any kind is when a partner or spouse emotionally withdraws from the relationship or marriage. Even if you try to talk to or confront your spouse or partner, he or she avoids or dismisses the conversation. This could mean that your spouse or partner is hiding something, even if it is harboring his or her own guilt.
- He or She is Protective of or Excessively Uses Their Phone.
Yes, in today’s digitally-driven era, we rely on our phones to shop, work, pay bills, and manage finances, plan meals, and even register for a class at the gym. Although digital devices play a huge role in our lives today, there is a limit…
If your partner or spouse always seems to be on his or her phone, whether it be texting or taking phone calls at odd hours during the night, then these could be signs that he or she is cheating.
Furthermore, if your partner or spouse seems overly-protective of his or her phone—they panic if you go near or touch their phone, for example —then this likely means that he or she is hiding something.
- You Can’t Ever Seem to Reach Him or Her.
If you have been married to your spouse for some time, then you likely know his or her schedule. Couples in healthy relationships and marriages naturally share what they are doing or what they did over the course of a day.
However, if they stop sharing or communicating about what they do or where they go, or they never seem to be where they say they are going to be, or “supposed” to be, then this could be a red flag.
Furthermore, if your phone calls or texts to them always seem to go unanswered, then this could be a sign that your partner or spouse is cheating.
- They Seem Angry, Defensive, or Nervous.
If you try to approach them about what is going on (even if you don’t accuse him or her of cheating), and they seem angry, nervous, or defensive, then this is a sign that your partner could be cheating.
In fact, most people who are guilty of something usually react out of anger. This is because they are usually protecting their own fears and insecurities. Some partners might even make you feel bad or guilty about approaching the subject.
- Their Behavior is Different.
Many partners and spouses who cheat will immediately begin acting or behaving differently. This could be dressing differently, acting emotionally distant, or even losing interest in things they used to enjoy. Any difference in mood or behavior is a cause for concern and could be a red flag.
- A Lack of Intimacy.
If it’s been some time since you and your partner or spouse had —you know—any intimate time together, then this is likely a sign that your relationship or marriage is not only on the fritz, but that your spouse or partner could be getting his or her physical needs elsewhere.
Turn to a Family Law Attorney in Stuart, Florida Turn for Help
It’s normal for relationships and marriages to go through rough patches or challenges. After all, we are all human. If your spouse and partner are behaving differently, then he or she might be struggling emotionally for a totally unrelated issue and might not be doing anything disloyal. Therefore, it’s important to approach the subject calmly and carefully, and avoid outwardly accusing your partner.
However, if there are signs that your partner or spouse is cheating, try to have an open, calm, and healthy discussion about your feelings and see where it goes.